Surrender to the Pure Love of a Faithful Lover
How do you fall in love? How do you know if it’s love or something…less? Is true love even possible? Is lasting, enduring, faithful love still accessible? Was it ever?
What does it feel like to fall in love? Is it safe to drop your guard and open your heart? How can you find the strength to love after you’ve been betrayed?
Love is intoxicating - and – terrifying. It’s compelling and repelling.
Love is truly something we cannot live without. Regardless of how shattered our hearts may be or how many hearts we’ve broken – love is the core of our human identity.
Why?
Because God is love and He’s made us in His image. We cannot follow Jesus without falling in love.
If we ever encounter God’s presence, we experience the truest, purest, most potent, satisfying, healing, safe love there ever was or will be.
Whatever else it means or looks like to be a Christian, follow Jesus, or receive the gospel – it cannot mean anything LESS than falling in love with God, following Jesus in love, being filled to overflowing with the love of the Holy Spirit, and enjoying loving all of creation with the God who is love.
True life starts, ends, and is sustained by nothing less than true love.
Surrendering to Intimate Love is a Massive Risk
Of all the metaphors the Bible offers to describe God’s relationship with His people – husband to wife is prominent. The church is called the Bride of Christ. The culmination of history is presented as a wedding feast, as Jesus receives His bride in love.
This may not feel like good news to everyone. Implicit in the concept of marriage is intimacy, vulnerability, trust, and commitment. Let’s be honest – that can be so intimidating.
Have you noticed that most modern love stories don’t get beyond “I do”? (I’m looking at you, Hallmark!)
“Happily ever afters” don’t seem to even exist in fairy tales anymore. Elsa yearns to let it go, and Moana is obsessed with how far the ocean goes.
Neither cares about finding true love. Prince Charming gets a B plot for supporting characters.
Justice and identity are the refrain of this generation’s song. True love? Sweep-you-off-your-feet romance? Little ditties about Jack and Diane? Falling into a ring of fire?
Not so much.
This isn’t a criticism. Just an observation. I’m glad that my kids were inspired to be strong and seek adventure instead of waiting for “true love” to fulfill their every longing.
The Bible is clear that we should not awaken love until it desires. Still, there is a time when love desires to be woken up, and we should embrace all of it. Even though the thought of opening up your heart to love can invoke fear.
I understand why.
After two decades of marriage, I still find it challenging to be vulnerable with my wife. My heart rate still spikes when I take the risk of pursuing her heart.
Romantic love does something to your heart that nothing else can. It promises – and threatens – that you will be fully known. Seen. Naked.
Kathy and Tim Keller put the dilemma so well.
“To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear.”
This is what it means to be the Bride of Christ. The church. We get to be fully known and fully loved by God Almighty. By God’s grace empowering us, we can risk letting the core of our being be seen and loved.
God is not going to allow us to miss this goodness. Jesus is coming back. But not for an army. Or servants. Or business partners.
He’s coming back for a bride.
Surrendering to Love is Worth the Risk
I love my wife more than any person on the planet. On my best days and in my vulnerable moments, I would do anything to see her thrive.
Everything in me wants her to know she is safe, supported, believed in, cherished, delighted in, desired, and empowered.
I want her to be fully alive. It gives my heart inexpressible joy to see her fully affirmed in all of who she is and released to use the full force of her person to bring beauty, joy, goodness, and compassion into this world.
I want her to know that in my eyes, she is the most beautiful, interesting, engaging person that has walked on this earth since Jesus.
Her unrestrained laugh – the kind where she can barely catch her breath – absolutely stops my entire world. When a moment catches her by surprise and a smile adorns her face, golly. My heart melts into a pile of butter.
For real. Even still. After over twenty years of being together. Her smile still makes me completely lose track of my train of thought.
There is no one else I want to spend time with. Or share experiences with. Nearly everything that happens during my day I anticipate being able to share with her.
I am so, so proud of her. I can’t constrain myself from showing off her art. Or the furniture she’s built. Or tell the stories of how God is using her patient, welcoming love to absolutely transform lives.
If she’s ever sad or scared – there is no other issue in all of creation that can compete for my attention. And strength. She gets it all.
When God said, that he who finds a wife finds a good thing – my goodness. I am so beyond blessed that God is allowing me to build a life with this woman who He loves relentlessly.
God’s Love is Better Than Life
If you're willing to receive this – everything I just wrote about how I feel about my wife is a distant, dull, diluted echo of the vibrant, potent love God feels for you. And me. For His bride, the church.
It’s hard for me to receive this love. It feels like it’s too much. Too good. Too potent. Too exposing. Too risky. Too vulnerable. Too disarming. Like it will make me lose control and do ANYTHING for God.
This is what true love does, doesn’t it? It compels you to make ridiculous decisions. To drive through the night just to be close to your love. To eat nothing but peanut butter sandwiches to be able to afford an engagement ring.
To run away, stay up all night just talking, rearrange every plan you’ve ever had, write songs, poems, and give yourself away.
Jesus loves YOU like this.
A glance of your eyes melts His heart. He can’t restrain Himself from pursuing you in love. Like an overfilled water balloon, just the slightest prick of affection from you and God’s heart bursts with love.
YOU are cherished, pursued, delighted in, fought for, chosen, enjoyed, wanted, loved. God is head-over-heels, recklessly, can’t-contain-Himself in love with YOU!
He’s so madly in love with you that He would leave heaven, come to earth, give up His thrown, lay down His life, bleed Himself dry – to rescue you.
Would you dare to believe that you are loved THAT much? The cross of Christ demands that you settle for nothing less. He loves you intimately.
He is loyal. You are unable to mess this up. He won’t leave. You won’t embarrass Him. He’s not going to get bored with you and move on. God’s love for you is so pure. He isn’t using you. He can’t gaslight you.
Jesus loves you to death. Literally. And back to life. He would – He has – gone to Hell and back for you. There isn’t a lover on the face of the planet that can even pretend to love you like Jesus.
He can’t stand the thought of anything ever getting in the way of His ability to love you and enjoy the love you offer Him. God sent His Holy Spirit so that He could tenderly, carefully, intimately be wrapped around the core of your being – forever.
You can’t earn this love. You can’t lose it either. It’s freely given in Christ. It’s been forever sealed by His death for you – and even more – His resurrection and ascension has guaranteed your eternal, abundant life.
Like an ancient dowry – Jesus paid the price for you to enjoy being His bride. He won’t let anything steal any of the joy He wants to share with you. Forever.
Replacing Love with Religion
You can fail to experience the sweetness of God’s love, though. Even as a full-on Christian.
I have.
You can wander away from your first love. You can begin your faith journey in the power of the Holy Spirit, but be deceived into striving to maintain God’s love in your own strength.
You can guard your heart with God’s glory.
Yup.
When God swoops in to affectionately, fervently embrace all of who you are – including your doubts, sin, failures, hopes, dreams, and strengths - you can stiff-arm Him by offering a cold handshake.
That is, you give God the most presentable version of yourself that you can muster up. You don’t just pray for whatever is on your heart. You pray for what you think you should.
It feels more respectful. Safer. Religious.
Ironically, that false sense of safety is dangerous for our souls. Luke 7:36 – 50 displays it clearly. In this story, Jesus has His feet anointed, cleaned, and dried by a “sinful” woman.
Surrendering to the Safety of a Faithful Lover
We can’t appreciate how shocking this was without understanding the cultural context. Kenneth Baily does an outstanding job of putting the proper historical, cultural, and contextual backdrop in place.
Jesus was invited to a dinner by a Pharisee. A religious leader. His name was Simon. I don’t know if he liked to do drawerings or not…
But it’s clear he threw this charade of a dinner party to try to put Jesus in His place. From Simon’s perspective, Jesus was this upstart, young, unlicensed Rabbi. His platform was growing unchecked.
So Simon invited Jesus over for dinner – to publicly shame Him. Which was, and is, a massive offense in Middle Eastern culture.
Simon intentionally withheld every hospitable custom from Jesus. This is what Jesus describes in Luke 7:44 – 46.
It seems, then, that the “sinful” woman, who loved Jesus like crazy, was overcome with grief by what they were doing to Him. She couldn’t contain herself. Or control her affection for Him. Luke 7:38 says she stood behind Jesus weeping.
Using what she had, she gave Jesus the honor the religious leaders withheld. They didn’t even give Jesus water to wash His own feet, so she used her tears to clean them. And since they didn’t provide a towel to dry His feet, she used her hair.
Now that move, letting her hair down in public, was shockingly scandalous. In conservative Middle Eastern cultures, women won’t let their hair be seen in public. Even today. This is why many women wear a hijab when they’re out and about.
In some situations, a woman wouldn’t even let her hair down in her home if she had sons. Only her husband would be permitted to see her hair.
For many men, they would not see a woman’s hair until their wedding night.
So when this woman lets her hair down in public to wash Jesus’ feet, she declares to everyone in the room and to all of history that she is as committed to Jesus as a wife would be to a husband. He has her full loyalty, affection, commitment – everything.
She will be eternally honored for choosing to be dishonored with Jesus in that moment. You see, Jesus couldn’t care less if we “follow the rules.” He wants our hearts. Our affection. Our intimate, vulnerable, hold-nothing-back love.
God Doesn’t Play Games With Your Heart
I’m fully convinced that every human being wants to love, and be loved, like this. Recklessly. Lavishly.
We crave the feeling of being so in love we would throw all caution to the wind and let the chips fall where they may.
This is the temperature of love we have with God. Fact check me on this. Read each gospel account in its entirety and pay attention to how Jesus responds when people throw their whole heart at His feet.
He responds. Oh good night, He responds! He receives their love. Without qualification. Or hesitation. He fulfills their desires – from the surface to the core.
And He defends them. Jesus defended the woman in Luke 7, right? He stood up for her. And the woman the religious leaders were going to execute. And the kiddos that the disciples told to go away.
He’ll do the same for you. And me.
The safest place for your heart is to be recklessly surrendered to the prodigal love of the Triune God.
Paradoxically, our hearts are only vulnerable to the extent that we hold them back from the love of God.
With God you are safe to let your heart run wild with a white-hot passion that will liberate you to live like a fool in love.
Selling everything you have, leaving everything you’ve known, carrying your cross, losing yourself – all so that you can find your truest self wrapped up in the loving arms of God.
Surrender is the Only Way
I know it’s hard to just be loved. All kinds of lying, sneering, taunting voices try to tell you that it’s not safe. But the still, small voice of your true and faithful lover won’t relent.
God is love. He won’t let us settle for anything less than enjoying Him as He is. Love.
When you wander, He’ll find you. When you doubt, He’ll reassure you. When you struggle, He’ll be patient.
When you take the risk of receiving His love – not even death itself will be able to hold Him back!
Love God with everything you have, hold nothing back, and He will defend you. Your love will cause the King of Heaven to leap off His throne and dance with delight!
You can have the life and love you yearn for. It’s available to you – right now today – in the intimate embrace of God.
Surrendering to God’s intimate, faithful love is how God prepares us to enjoy eternity with Him together. This is how He transforms Jesus’ Church into a pure, radiant bride. That is your future.
You have been created by Love in love for love. Life is found when we surrender to Love.
