6 Ways the Holy Spirit Imparts Inner Peace Through Adopting Us into God’s Family
“Dad. How in the world did you ever convince Mom to marry you?”
My son recently asked me this. I get it. She is so far out of my league that you’d think I must be rich.
I’m not.
So, how did I pull off convincing the most beautiful, talented, compassionate, strong, intelligent woman in the world to marry me?
It wasn’t easy, I tell ya. It required dogged determination. Divine intervention. And going home.
If you were to ask Kristy, she would tell you that she started falling in love with me during a trip to see my family. The closer we got to my hometown, the more relaxed and playful I became.
She saw a side of me that she didn’t know existed. At home, I had – and have – the capacity to engage with the world as if everything is going to be ok. Like we’re all going to be taken care of. I acted as if a place exists where there’s enough food in the fridge and even cookies in the snack drawer.
Can you imagine how good it would feel to live like you don’t have to keep the world spinning?
The weight of responsibility many carry is exhausting.
Bills.
Kids.
Community.
So. Much. Pressure.
And yet, we don’t want to live like we’re on vacation. Know what I mean? We all need a break from time to time, but we want our lives to have meaning and purpose.
We crave deep, robust relationships where we’re not just tolerated, but enjoyed. And that, by people we respect and enjoy.
What would you say if I told you that a place does exist where you can drop your guard, live like everything is going to be ok – and – engage with all of your being in ways that are jam-packed with value?
This place does exist. It’s how the children of God can live under the loving care of God the Father. My heart desperately longs to know and experience this reality. Doesn’t yours?
Is God Disappointed or Irritated with You?
Before we sit down at this amazing feast of manna from heaven and living water, let’s get the junk food out of the way so we don’t spoil our appetite.
For too long, I wrongly believed that the Holy Spirit’s primary job was to convict us of our sin. This comes from John 16:8.
“When he comes, he will convict the world about sin, righteousness, and judgment”
But look at that passage closely.
D.A. Carson points out how when John uses the phrase “The World,” he refers to a kingdom that resists and rebels against God’s loving rule and reign. This is how the Holy Spirit communicates with people who don’t yet know how much God loves them.
Now, if you wrongly believe that the Holy Spirit is essentially an undercover cosmic cop, just waiting for you to mess up so He can convict you, you’re going to have an incredibly hard time wanting to hear God.
In some circles, the most spiritual people are thought to be the ones who are the most self-deprecating.
In my very personal experience, this perspective never produced anything in or through me that felt like an abundant life, streams of living water, or a light yolk and easy burden.
God has so much better for us than this.
6 Ways the Holy Spirit Assures Us of God the Father’s Love
Romans 8:15 – 17 clearly displays six astounding ways God loves confirming how much He loves being our Father.
Romans 8:15 – 17 is like the front door of the family you long to belong to. Wanna walk through it?
“15 For you did not receive a spirit of slavery to fall back into fear. Instead, you received the Spirit of adoption, by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father!”
16 The Spirit himself testifies together with our spirit that we are God’s children, 17 and if children, also heirs—heirs of God and coheirs with Christ—if indeed we suffer with him so that we may also be glorified with him.”
The Holy Spirit is Ecstatic to Live Life with You
The Holy Spirit of God is so, so happy to dwell inside you. I almost can’t believe I just wrote that.
How often are you so, so happy to live in your own skin? With your:
We so often want to ESCAPE our circumstances, wishing we had someone else’s gifts, personality, status, and so forth.
But God chooses to ENGAGE our reality in real time. Because He wants to.
Isn’t it wild that God of all creation LOVES being intimately intertwined with the core of your being – right where you are, in this moment?
God LOVES being your Father. Jesus LOVES being your big brother and best friend. The Holy Spirit LOVES reminding and convincing you that you are a cherished child of the living God.
In fact, that is the PRIMARY job of the Holy Spirit in the lives of the followers of Jesus.
2. The Holy Spirit Comforts us with the Strong Love of our Father
Romans 8:15 says that we are given THE Spirit of adoption. The Holy Spirit is relentlessly committed to convincing you of your place in God’s family that He self-identifies as the Spirit of Adoption. Not conviction.
Does this mean we never need to be convicted of doing bad stuff? Of course not.
But how and why God convicts us is of an entirely different perspective than our hearts even have the capacity to receive.
There is an eternal difference between the nagging, taunting voice of an irritated god who just wants you to get yourself together and knock it off already – and – the voice of a loving Father who refuses to let you settle for anything less than the fullness of the abundant life He would die for you to enjoy with Him.
We need the Holy Spirit of God to empower us to embrace the magnitude of this mind-blowingly good news.
God loves being your Father. Everything about it.
Jesus taught us to pray to our Father because Jesus loves being a Son and wants us to enjoy the blessing and beauty of being adopted into the family of God.
3. God Fights off our Fears
Romans 8:15 contrasts a spirit of slavery and fear with the Spirit of Adoption.
Earlier, Romans 8:12 said that we’re not obligated to the flesh. The passage contrasts feeling so afraid that you act out – with being adopted into the family of God.
That’s an interesting contrast, isn’t it?
Romans 8:13 says we need to put to death the deeds of the flesh by the power of the Spirit so that we can live.
Now, when I typically think of “deeds of the flesh,” the first things that come into my mind are what we are tempted to indulge in or escape with.
Sex, drugs, and rock and roll! Right?
The Bible isn’t afraid to warn us about how damaging it can be to devalue ourselves and objectify others. It’s playing with fire that we can’t control.
But are you tempted to indulge like that when you’re terrified of something?
Most aren’t.
Fight, Flight, or Freeze: Where do you Turn When You’re Afraid?
When we feel threatened, we instinctively default to fight, flight, or freeze. At least that’s what the social scientists tell us.
When I feel threatened, I freeze. I just don’t know what to do.
The reality is, we’re always vulnerable in every way. That’s part of what it means to be human.
Bullies can walk through our lives and trash everything just to get a laugh. Abusers destroy. Health fails. The list goes on and on.
That pervading sense of fear, then, causes us to react in all kinds of unhealthy ways. Know what I mean? Some of the things I am most embarrassed about in my life have come from acting out of fear.
I’ve been afraid I’ll be overlooked, so I’ve tried to outwork everyone.
I’ve been afraid I’ll be betrayed, so I don’t let people in.
I’ve been afraid that I just won’t be accepted, so I compromise my own convictions, priorities, and preferences to try to keep other people happy with me.
In my fear, I have acted like a coward and not protected the people closest to me from the attacks of others.
I’m sure you can relate to this on some level. We have all done what Romans 8 describes. We’ve been afraid, bowed down to pressure in painful ways that we’re ashamed of.
God gives us Better Options
God sees. He knows. And He is filled with compassion. Since God is our Father, and the Holy Spirit of Adoption lives in us, we now have access to more responses than just fight, flight, or freeze.
We can cry out, Abba Father. This is incredible. Check this out.
The word translated cry out, could be translated, “shriek.” It’s the same word that’s used for when demons shriek after meeting Jesus. It’s a visceral, guttural, desperate cry for help.
And notice who the cry is directed to: Abba Father.
Abba is the tender word for dad, like daddy. And Father, that’s the powerful, dignified word for the head of an extended, honored family.
Don’t miss this. Who shrieks out with primal passion for the tender, powerful Father? It’s the Holy Spirit in us! He’s screaming for God to come. Rescue. Protect. Defend. Deliver. Restore.
4. Jesus Overpowered the Source of Our Fears
Jesus lived every moment of His life as if the attentive care of the Father was as accessible to Him as the oxygen He needed to breathe.
When people didn’t believe Him or believe in Him, it didn’t sway Him in the least.
Sometimes people demanded He perform miracles to prove He was God’s Son. Didn’t care.
When crowds were starving, He had no doubt in His mind that the Father would take care of them all.
He could play with kids and hang out with the burnouts and dropouts because He didn’t need to secure social status.
He chose 12 disciples who were not impressive – because He didn’t need to impress anyone. He was unshakably secure in the love of the Father.
So secure, in fact, that He opened up His arms, as wide as the cross, to share that love with us. On the cross, the Son of God cried out to the Father – My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
Everything we’re afraid of – Jesus experienced the fullness of it at its source – so that we would never have to. His life was the price God had to pay so that we could be adopted.
And we know that the payment has been fully processed because three days after Jesus was crucified, the Holy Spirit raised Him from the dead – the same Spirit that lives in us and loves to convince us of our place in God’s family.
5. The Holy Spirit Exposes and Disposes the Lie that You’re Not Loved
This is how we put to death the deeds of the flesh by the Spirit. When we feel threatened, we aren’t limited to flight, fight, or freeze. We can also cry out to our Father.
In Romans 8:17, there is this bit about suffering with Jesus that we need to consider. This suffering is part of putting to death the deeds of the flesh.
I just can’t believe how amazingly good God is. Think about this in context.
Do you see what we are putting to death and the kind of life-giving suffering God’s inviting us into?
This is saying – put to death living like you aren’t loved. Crucify it. Don’t give it a second thought.
Put to death living like you aren’t delighted in.
Don’t even entertain the thought that you are anything other than a fearfully and wonderfully made masterpiece of God that He is so thrilled with that His heart bursts with so much joy when He thinks about you that He dances with delight!
I can live like I have nothing to prove to you because God has proved His love for me. We don’t have to compete with each other because God’s affection and attention are infinite.
6. The Holy Spirit Positions Us to Stand in Awe of God
You may be tempted to think that what I’ve written here could lead to narcissism, self-indulgence, or worse.
And of course, any shred of truth or beauty can be twisted into something toxic. But if the Devil wants us to believe any lie, it’s that God could love us TOO much.
God is love. He made human beings to enjoy the safety, security, and strength of His love. And because God is infinite, we will never be able to contain His love; it has to overflow.
The Holy Spirit gives us the emotional security of having a place in God’s heavenly family. This lets us live like the salt of the earth and the light of the world, doing good deeds with such joy that we don’t even notice or care who sees.
Researchers have found that one of the most essential experiences for humanity is awe. Transcendence. When we experience wonder, we shrink in all the best ways.
“Psychologists have found that awe can lead to a "small self" effect, which promotes humility and reduces tendencies toward materialism and self-centered behavior.”
Now, what is better than being left in awe in the presence of the God who is love – knowing that He is thrilled to experience all of life with you?
We love – BECAUSE – He loves us first.
The Holy Spirit Invites us to Fully Surrender to the Love of the Father
The perfect love of your heavenly Father will cast out every fear you have. It is better to spend one day in the courts of our God than a thousand elsewhere.
This is not a love we can strive for or struggle our way into earning. All we can do is surrender to the love of God – fall into His arms, and let His tender, strong care satisfy our souls to overflow with His love.
The eternal truth is that Jesus loves loving you because He is the God who is love and loves loving your love for Him.
This is abundant life. It’s fully and freely yours in Jesus.
